This time of year, you can’t take a few steps without someone asking you for a donation. To be honest, it gets to be a bit annoying. I can’t give to everyone and I feel horrible having to say ‘Not Today’, repeatedly. By the time I walk from one side of the mall to the other, I feel so beaten down and ashamed that I couldn’t give to everyone that asked. I feel like someone’s tracking me to see how many times I actually donate vs how many times I decline.

Am I a bad person?

The holidays are stressful enough without me worrying about how much money I’m going to give away. And besides, why does it have to be during the holidays when my expenses double?



What really annoys me are the big corporations that want you to donate to their fund every time you make a purchase. Why would I do that? They want me to put my money into their fund so that they can lay claim to being the good guy. They get to put their name on the big cheque (yes, I’m Canadian) that’s presented to their charity of choice. They are the ones who get a tax credit for their charitable donation.

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What truly irritates me about this, is that it’s more about the PR for them than it is about the deed. If they were sincere about helping out an organization, I’d like to see them send some of the paid staff to give hands-on support throughout the year, rather than buying their ‘generosity’ once a year based on money raised by their clients.


Don’t get me wrong, not all corporations are this shallow and self-serving. There are a few that actually do good with donating their time and resources to helping others. (It’s a short list.)

You might be thinking that I’m against giving. I’m not. What I am against is the mindless, heartless, even selfish contributions people make so they can add a check mark beside their name on Santa’s Good Girl or Good Boy list. This is an attempt at clearing your own conscious to feel like you did your part and don’t have to be concerned about the problem beyond that.



You can’t help everybody, but if you have a roof over your head with heat and electricity and you’re eating three squares a day, you have more than enough. You can make a difference in someone’s else’s life. The holidays remind us of that. You can at least help somebody.

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                                     SACRIFICE IS FOR MARTYRS


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Giving is so much more than dropping money in a bucket. That to me is being a martyr. If you do it out of guilt, if you do it to satisfy some need to acknowledge that you gave, if you do it to feel like a good person, then that to me is giving from a place of being a martyr. In essence you’re doing it to get something out of it for yourself.

Successful Experts know this and adopt a different view of giving.


There are real people on the other side of your donation. What you do matters. Most of us in our ‘ordinary lives’, far exceed what some can only dream of having. It’s not just about poverty. There are people all around you that could use a little attention from you

Is there an elderly person in your neighborhood that would love to put up Christmas lights, but can’t do it on their own anymore?

Do you know someone who’s family fell apart this year Could they use a little company?

Pay attention to what’s around you. What can you give of yourself because you have more than enough. That’s an abundance mindset.



There’s a spiritual principle called Tithing. It states that things you have don’t really belong to you. Think about it. When you came into this world, you had nothing. When you die, you leave with nothing. You have things because you’ve been blessed to have them.   Sure you may have worked for it and you deserve to have it. That’s awesome. Good work deserves good rewards. Tithing means that you give away 10% of everything you earn because it doesn’t really belong to you.


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In that spirit of generosity, you get to acknowledge that you have enough, you have money flowing into your life and you are able to use some of it to make a difference for others who may not have what you do.   When I move money through me in this way, I send it along with a silent blessing of my own so that wherever it ends up, whoever it may touch that they receive a blessing from it.   I release it with the ease of knowing that money continues to flow into my life.



Don’t treat giving like a chore, obligation or duty. Give from a place of knowing that you have enough, you have so much that it’s easy to share it.

Be responsible and mindful with your donations. Know who you’re giving to. Understand how it’s going to help someone.

‘When you get, give. When you learn, teach’

~ Maya Angelou

I used to occasionally drop a Toonie (Canadian coin version of a two dollar bill) into the Salvation Army bucket around the holidays. I had no idea what they did with the money they collected. At that time, I dropped a coin in their bucket to make myself feel good – to feel like I did my part. Part of what? I had no idea. In a sense, it was a selfish act.

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A few years back when my marriage had fallen apart, I found myself sitting in a police station late one night seeking safety from my ex. I left my home that night with just the clothes on my back and my handbag, expecting to return. But I didn’t. They put me up in a hotel room that night until they could remove my ex from the family home the next day.

I was in an absolute blur that night, but I do remember being escorted to the hotel room by the police and being greeted by a woman who asked me a few questions and had me sign papers because they were covering the cost of my stay there. She was with the Salvation Army.

Today, I continue to drop a Toonie into the bucket, but now I slow down and smile at the soul standing guard and I say thank you.




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Last week was my birthday. I set up a challenge that no one but me knew about. I decided that for every birthday wish I received, I would contribute a certain dollar amount and forward it to a mentor that feeds my spiritual growth (another definition of tithing). I felt that every birthday greeting I received was such a blessing to me, I wanted to honor it. I received 74 birthday blessings that I will now pass along.

Successful people understand and practice these principles. It’s not just about giving because you can, it’s how you give that creates meaning and generates gratitude for the abundance you already have. This in turn keeps a channel open for you to receive more abundance.


When you give this season (and beyond),

  • give from a place of gratitude and abundance
  • know who you’re giving to – that’s the intention you are feeding
  • offer a blessing that the money, time, gift or sharing you provide expands the blessings to whomever it may reach
  • whenever you give, acknowledge that you are success-FUL
  • witness as the abundance expands in your life


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Oh, I forgot to mention, when you operate in this way, be ready for an influx of greater things coming your way 😉  It’s a natural side effect.







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